Sitting in my Starbucks again. It’s been a while since I have been here alone. It’s kind of weird sitting here now because I know so many of the people around me. I’m officially a regular and I, therefore, know the other regulars. I’ve met some awesome people, that is for sure. From the old lady who has granchildren in California making movies for Warner Bros to the Curly hair guy from Hawaii who is so lonely. And then of course there is Gary. Gary is an older gentleman that reads like a fiend. I met him first when he told Joseph to “make sure you are treating that woman right”. Multiple times after that everytime we would see him he would say things like that. I love that he felt like he should pass his knowledge down to the next generation. We now have met his wife and had multiple conversations with him about his books, and life. Those are wonderful friendships. 

Sitting here, however, can lead to some crazy thoughts. I’m not the person to always listen in on conversations, or at least I have begun trying to not be ‘that’ person. But, I do think that if you are stupid enough to talk loud enough for EVERYONE around you to hear you then you obviously don’t care if I listen. hah. Seriously though, it’s amazing what you can hear if you open your ears. 

I was just sitting here minding my own business, earphones in, and above my Hillsong United I hear “it’s just so easy to love him”. Naturally my ears perked up considering I heard it over my fairly loud music, through my earphones, and it was coming from a man. a rather tall, oddly dressed, bald man. saying that it is ‘easy to love HIM’. Turns out he’s not homosexual – instead he’s a pastor. and the ‘HIM’ he is referring to is God. He continued on to say that ‘It’s just so easy to love God. Why wouldn’t you, and how would anyone be mad or upset with him? ever “ 

I honestly am not sure how I feel about that. I LOVE God. I really do. I am enthralled by the fact that He loves me. But, when all is said and done I have been mad at Him at times. I have wondered what in the world He is doing up there and why things are going this way or that way. Loving Him does not come easy to me, all the time. Am I alone in that thought? I really would like to hear what other people have to say about this. 

Thinking about the Psalms it doesn’t seem like David, a man after God’s own heart, was happy-go-lucky with God at all times. There were times when He questioned God (not his belief in Him but actually what He is doing). There were times when he told God how he is feeling and that wasn’t all warm fuzzies and smiles all the time. 

This is something that I have honestly been thinking about more lately then ever before. Is a sincere relationship with God always easy? I used to think that if I wasn’t truly happy with God  or with situations in my life that I shouldn’t think about it or I definitely shouldn’t ‘let God know’. Im realizing though, that if I am honest and vulnerable with God I verbalize how I feel to Him no matter what it is. He knows already so why wouldn’t I talk it out? 

It’s amazing what can spark so many thoughts. 

Let me know what you think…